Kandy Kruise 2008 Pt. 2

Some called it the Kandy Kruise. Some called it a crazy party on a boat. Some called it decadence on the Riviera. Some called it the unforgettable adventure. I called it pure bliss. I have written about some insane parties in my time and so many times I have said the words “words cannot explain,” but this, my friends, takes the cake because WORDS cannot explain what took place on that cruise ship for three days off the coast of California and Mexico.

I had heard of this so-called “Kandy Kruise” the year prior but didn’t pay much attention to it because any downtime I had I wanted to be home. This year however… one thing led to another and through various discussions with Marvin Epstein, Dylan Marer, and Eric Stotz (the brains and movers and shakers behind the whole operation) I decided to join ship. And with me comes the posse… all of my best friends including my dad.

The cruise was set to sail from Long Beach on Sept. 12th for three days. Down to Ensenada and back. What makes THIS cruise different than any other cruise on the planet is that every single girl on the ship was hand selected. Yes you read it correctly — every single girl on board had to send an application into the Karma Foundation (the main sponsor behind the cruise). That application included sending headshots and answering a detailed survey that posed questions such as the following — “if you were candy what type of candy would you be and why?” I don’t know about you but a ship loaded with 1,250 girls who were HAND selected out of over 10,000 applicants who actually took the time to answer such questions is the kind of ship I want to be on. The girl to guy ratio was a solid 2 to 1. PROSPECTIVE.

Only about 750 guys were on board. The price for a standard room ranged between $1k and $6k depending on what type of living quarters you wanted to have. A nice suite with a balcony was $12k (up to two guys) and a box with fold out beds about $3k (up to three guys) and all the girls were basically accommodated for FREE. What a great concept!!!

So many times when I write articles I wish I could just let it all out. If there was ever a time I wish I could just write freely without any consequences this would be that time. WOW. From the second the boat left the dock to the second it came back it was a NONSTOP party. Imagine the BEST party you’ve ever been to — get that image in your head — now MULTIPLY the quality of the party times four and extend the length of the party to three days. What you now have is the Kandy Kruise. Imagine 1,250 HOTTIES on a boat with NOWHERE to go… their friends can’t take them home because they’re all STUCK on a ship!!!

Every four to five hours a new party started. And each party had its own theme. Whether it was the white party (everybody wore white clothes) to the sunrise Ibiza party, there was ALWAYS something going on… sleep was not a major priority for anybody. Each party had a bad ass DJ — ranging from the likes of DJ Skribble or DJ Mister E and so on. Most of the action was around the pool where the big spenders had their own cabanas. With each cabana came two cabana girls that were there for whatever you needed. From food to booze to lists of events to pulling in girls… they were there for YOU. Thank you Mary and Jackie — I’m pretty sure we had the two best cabana girls on the ship.

Besides the insane partying there was a Miss Kandy competition on board. This competition consisted of swimsuits and runway modeling and lingerie… being a judge in this thing was not necessarily a bad thing ;-) . Lets just say that when the girls found out you were a judge they tended to be a tad bit on the friendlier side. There was also a poker tournament which I had the great pleasure of hosting. It boasted none other than the greatest tournament director on earth — Matt Savage. The tournament was fun and the firstplace winner got a private jet for the weekend with second place getting a yacht and so on. As much as I love poker I didn’t want to miss any of the action on the boat! But I couldn’t skip it. I mean a part of my deal with Karma was to host this event but the mere thought of missing some of the fun in the sun drove me crazy! I’VE NEVER, EVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE THIS BEFORE IN MY LIFE.

I can honestly say I’ve never ever had more fun. That is an incredibly bold statement but one that is deadly accurate. Also true for EVERY single one of my friends. All twelve of them said they had never had a better time — also my FATHER said it was the best time he has ever had. The week after we came home he called me and said, “Son I’ve been laying in bed semi-daydreaming trying to figure out if the cruise really happened.” This is my 63-year-old dad!! I wish you could have seen him — he was on top of a table with his shirt off dancing with a bottle of Patron in his hand. It was complete madness.

I HIGHLY recommend anyone interested to do whatever necessary to make the next Kandy Kruise. As of now they are scheduled for one a year but there is a chance for another one out of Miami in a few months. I’m crossing my fingers! I personally cannot imagine ever missing this party that really shouldn’t exist. It simply is TOO good. Congratulations to Mindi Smith for winning the Miss Kandy competition and to Craig Rudolph for taking down the poker tournament.

And a very special thanks to Marvin and Dylan — how you guys put together such an extraordinary event is beyond me. My absolute favorite part was watching the captain of the chartered Carnival cruise ship look out on the party — the look on his face was priceless. I’d be willing to bet he’s never seen anything like that on his ship before. Only 300 or so days to go until the next Kandy Kruise. Please let the days go by faster!

December 2008